what a "gleeful" world !!

"i was born in a small town, and i live in a small town, probably die in a small town, oh that's probably where they'll bury me."

and thank you john mellancamp for these wonderful but very depressing lyrics!!

yes, one of my very FAVORITE tv shows is "glee" and if i could live my life breaking out into song for certain situations in my life ~ you betcha ~ i totally would ! i think i will just sort of blog that way and revert to song lyrics when the mood strikes me to further illustrate exactly what i am trying to express!! if there were a song i would be singing right now it would be "small town" by mellancamp. yes, i live in a small town, i have lived in this same small town for the majority of my life ~ and i hate it.

let me tell you about my small town. today was the big high school homecoming football game and every year they have a parade through the middle of town with the football team and floats and homecoming queen candidates riding atop convertibles like pageant contestants ~ yah ~ cheesey ~ you honestly would have to see it to believe it! i just happened to be out doing some serious errand running about the time i heard it ~ the fire engine sirens signalling that the parade was starting to come through downtown. yes, you read it correctly, i did say fire engine sirens ~ it's like i told you ~ it is a huge deal in my "small town".

as i was trying to finish up what i needed to get accomplished there was something like this magnetic pull drawing me to the parade to see just how insane the whole entire thing was. as hard as i tried to fight it i couldn't resist walking away from my car and to the side of the street so that i could see for myself the homecoming festivities. and there they were, the mighty football players on their float behind the fire truck ~ then the truck carrying the high school principal and his cute little wife and their adorable children ~ then the band playing the school fight song that i will not admit that i think i still know the words to. the football players were on not only 1 float ~ but 2 floats solely dedicated to them. the first float for SENIORS ONLY ~ the stars of the team, playing their final homecoming game of their high school careers ~ the second float carrying the remainder of the team and coaches. after the football players were, as i imagined, the homecoming queen candidates perched atop the convertibles in their strapless evening gowns waving to the crowd like any good pageant contestant is taught how to do. next were the cheerleaders ~ who were certainly not very cheerful ~ they were SITTING on the float and i heard more noise from the football players on their float than i did from those so called cheerleaders. next were a few more lesser significant teams from the school like boys and girls soccer and then a couple of school clubs with floats then the class floats ~ one for each grade; freshman, sophomore, junior, senior. following up in the rear were 2 police cars with lights flashing making sure that these local celebraties were escorted through town without any mishaps.

it was over ~ and however much i didn't want to be captivated by this small town event ~ somehow i was, but i was struck with disbelief as i was standing there thinking "this is just not where i belong". never in a million years did i ever think i would be living in the small town where i grew up ~ i suppose i have to blame my husband for that. you see, he did not grow up in this small town and for whatever the reason he loves it and does not want to leave ~ even though i drop hints about moving all the time. i have a theory about my small town ~ it is that if you didn't grow up here and you found yourself here because this was where your career lead you then you really like living here, you appreciate the smallness. on the other hand ~ those of us who grew up here and because of marriage or careers have remained here, most of "us" don't like it quite so much. for me it is almost claustrophobic ~ it doesn't seem to be as quaint and picturesque as the small town that john mellancamp describes in his song.

"somewhere over the rainbow way up high there's a land that i've heard of once in a lullaby. somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue and the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true. someday i'll wish upon a star and wake up where the clouds are far behind me ~ where troubles melt like lemon drops away above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me. somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly. birds fly over the rainbow why then oh why can't i ? "

this was sort of more what i was thinking as i was growing up ~ that i wouldn't find myself staying here. i agree that it is a nice town ~ just not the what i would consider my place over the rainbow.